Today’s Campaign Update (Because the Campaign Never Ends)
Ok, I’m embarrassed to admit it, but I watched the Democrat debate last night. What a damn circus. – I suppose the best thing to say about this one was that at least they didn’t spend ten minutes promising to ban fracking, blot the global landscape with millions of 700 ft. tall windmills, and use Unicorn breath to power their fantasy-based energy plans.
But while the panel of pedantic CBS moderators at least spared us from that indignity, every other Democrat fantasy was played out once again for all to see on national television. Here are some of the highlights:
- Quid Pro Joe Biden, after informing America that he personally wrote the assault weapons ban – which will come as a huge surprise to Dianne Feinstein – of the 1990s, told us in his very next breath that, since that ban was repealed in 2006, “150 million Americans” have been mowed down on our streets by gun violence (the actual number is about 1/1000th of that). As if to emphasize that his multiple brain aneurysms were acting up again, the nation’s Unfrozen Caveman Senator emphasized that orders of magnitude exaggeration by informing us that that is more than those who have died in all of America’s wars combined (it isn’t even close). The raving lunatic will most likely claim he was misquoted today, that is if any corrupt journalist even bothers to ask him about it.
- The Commie went basically untouched throughout the debate, even though every other candidate did their best to molest him. But Sanders is just too unflappable to take their bait. His best moment for the demented Democrat voter base – and worst moment for his general election prospects – came when he once again expounded on the joys of Fidel Castro’s half-century of communist despotism in Cuba. He had even Fauxcahontas shaking her head in frustration by the end of the night.
- Speaking of Lieawatha, she repeated her outright lie about being fired from a teaching job at age 21 because she was pregnant, a lie that none of the corrupt fake CBS journalists made any effort to question. She laid out that whopper in the context of excoriating Mini-Mike Bloomberg for once telling a newly-pregnant female employee to “kill it!” Warren obviously went into last night’s debate hoping to devastate the tiny ex-mayor as she did in last week’s Las Vegas debate, but the “kill it” reference turned out to be a bridge too far, one that had even the CNN panelists tsk-tsking at her after the debate.
- Speaking of mayors, Preacher Pete was his usual sanctimoniously loquacious self, constantly interrupting others and pontificating about all manner of issues related to which he has zero practical experience, like Middle East policy. The guy who proved incapable of competently managing a town of 100,000 residents has a detailed plan for literally everything, making him the perfect running mate for The Commie, for whom he could serve in multiple roles as vice presidential candidate, accountant, actuary and lay preacher.
- Tom Steyer helped Mini-Mike form billionaire bookends at opposite ends of the stage lineup, and he stood there barking like a madman and constantly doing the whole rock-n-roll base guitarist chicken head nod as if he was yelling in time with a bad Black Sabbath number. No one could possibly pay attention to the words he was actually screaming due to all of the visual distractions he presents.
- Stuck standing next to Steyer and hopefully wearing ear plugs was Amy Klobuchar, who probably had the best night of any of the participants in terms of potentially appealing to enough voters to actually win in November. But it won’t matter. She simply cannot compete in the money race, and she makes too much occasional sense to ever hope to win the Party’s nomination in July. Her best moment came when she was talking about a housing bill she had authored, and Biden jumped in with one of his patented Turrets Syndrome-like “I wrote that bill!” blurts. Klobuchar just shook her head like an impatient mom scolding a 5 year-old child and said, “Joe, you didn’t write that bill.” I do not agree with Klobuchar on basically anything, but I’ve developed a grudging admiration for her because she is pretty much the only person on that stage who is authentically stating the things she believes. But authenticity, of course, is basically a death knell for any Democrat presidential candidate, so she will continue to tread water in the race.
- Finally, there’s Mr. Excitement, Mini-Mike Bloomberg. As mentioned above, Lieawatha went after him fiercely again because she has made the calculation that Bloomberg can’t stop The Commie and she sees herself now as Sanders’ likely running mate. The best thing that can be said about Bloomberg’s performance last night is that it wasn’t quite as awful as his performance last week. He was certainly helped along by moderators Norah O’Donnell and Gayle King, who tossed him several softball questions that the two had obviously prepared for in advance. Like Lester Holt last week, both CBS talking heads behaved as if they were firmly on Mr. Excitement’s payroll and want to stay there. Packing the auditorium’s audience with a no-doubt paid-for cheering section also helped.
The big question coming into this debate was whether Mini-Mike could rehabilitate himself and stop the bleeding following his disastrous performance in Las Vegas. The answer appears to be that he may have done just enough stabilize things through Super Tuesday, now just 6 days away. The tiny ex-Mayor’s problem there, though, is that he doesn’t hold a clear lead in a single one of those states as of today. He needed a big-time, confidence-inspiring performance last night and he just is not capable of delivering that in a debate format, especially one as chaotic as these Democrat debates have become.
The big winners last night were, in order:
Donald Trump, for the same obvious reasons he has been the big winner of all the previous Democrat debates;
The Commie, who didn’t take any big hits and will remain the clear front-runner;
Quid Pro Joe, who likely did just enough despite his major gaffe to secure a win in South Carolina.
The big losers were, in order:
Tom Steyer, who will lose badly on Saturday after pouring tens of millions into South Carolina;
Preacher Pete, who needed some sort of big moment to remain viable, and couldn’t do it.
Bottom line: Despite all of the histrionics and buffoonery on stage, this ended up being a status quo debate, one that solidified Quid Pro Joe’s firewall in South Carolina, firmed-up The Commie’s standing as the clear front-runner for the nomination, and ensured that Mr. Excitement will continue to waste hundreds of millions of his own fortune on paid advertising that has most likely already taken him as far as it can.
This is now officially The Commie’s race to lose.
Here are my updated odds for the ultimate winner of the Democrat nomination:
The Commie – 5 to 4
Mini-Mike – 5 to 1
Quid Pro Joe – 5 to 1
Fauxcahontas – 30 to 1
Preacher Pete – 50 to 1
Klobuchar – 100 to 1
Steyer – infinity to 1
Tulsi Gabbard – is she still running?
Someone not currently in the race – 3 to 1
That is all.
Today’s news moves at a faster pace than ever. Whatfinger.com is my go-to source for keeping up with all the latest events in real time.