Today’s Campaign Update, Part II
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
If Joe Biden didn’t actually exist, no one in their right mind would ever dream of making him up. – Today, a video clip surfaced of a 2017 speech (you can tell it’s a couple of years old because it appears to be about three facelifts ago) Joe Biden gave at a recreation center in a predominantly black community in Delaware. In it, Biden tells a story that he claims is true about being a lifeguard at the pool in 1962, and how a local gangster nicknamed “Corn Pop” used to torment him there.
In the clip, you will hear Biden’s infamous racial tin ear fully engaged, as he uses all manner of racially-insensitive language while relating what is likely a fairy tale. You will also see him hilariously invoke the name of 1940s swimmer/movie star Esther Williams, a reference that evokes nothing but blank stares from the audience gathered around him. There is literally not a single person other than Biden at this event who has the slightest clue who Esther Williams actually is.
Below is the clip, followed by a transcript of Biden’s classically moronic remarks.
First, the clip:
This is BIZARRE!
Here's Joe Biden telling the story of his face-off with a gang of razor-wielding ne'er-do-wells led by a guy named 'Corn Pop.' pic.twitter.com/DddRtWgdza
— Eddie Zipperer (@EddieZipperer) September 15, 2019
For those who still like to read stuff, here’s the unbelievable transcript:
“I learned a lot. And I learned that it makes a difference. This was the diving board area, and I was one of the guards, and they weren’t allowed to — it was a 3-meter board. And if you fell off sideways, you landed on the damn, er, darn cement over there.
“And CornPop was a bad dude. And he ran a bunch of bad boys. And back in those days — to show how things have changed — one of the things you had to use, if you used Pomade in your hair, you had to wear a baby cap. And so he was up on the board and wouldn’t listen to me. I said, ‘Hey, Esther Williams! You! Off the board, or I’ll come up and drag you off.’ Well, he came off, and he said, ‘I’ll meet you outside.’”
“My car was mostly, these were all public housing behind us. My car – there was a gate on here. I parked my car outside the gate. And he said, ‘I’ll be waiting for you. He was waiting for me with three guys with straight razors. Not a joke.
There was a guy named Bill Wright the only white guy and he did all the pools. He was a mechanic. And I said, ‘What am I gonna do?’ And he said. ‘Come down here in the basement, where all the mechanics- – where all the pool builder is.’ You know the chain, there used to be a chain that went across the deep end. And he cut off a six-foot length of chain, and folded it up and he said, ‘You walk out with that chain, and you walk to the car and say, ‘you may cut me man, but I’m gonna wrap this chain around your head.’
“I said, ‘You’re kidding me.’” He said, ‘No if you don’t, don’t come back.’ And he was right. So I walked out with the chain. And I walked up to my car. And in those days, you remember the straight razors, you had to bang ’em on the curb, gettin’ em rusty, puttin’ em in the rain barrel, gettin’ em rusty? And I looked at him, but I was smart, then. I said, ‘First of all,’ I said, ‘when I tell you to get off the board, you get off the board, and I’ll kick you out again, but I shouldn’t have called you Esther Williams, and I apologize for that. I apologize.’ But I didn’t know that apology was gonna work.
“He said, ‘you apologize to me?’ I said, ‘I apologize but not for throwing you out, but I apologize for what I said.’ He said, ‘OK,’ closed that straight razor, and my heart began to beat again.”
Naturally, all Biden’s talk about “bad dudes” and “bad boys” and “pomade” and the “guy named Bill Wright the only white guy” tossed the social media permanent outrage mob into a Twitter/Facebook frenzy.
But of course, that won’t last because Biden, our nation’s Unfrozen Caveman Senator, is a Democrat, and most African American Democrats like him regardless of his obvious, clueless racism.
But again, the most classically Biden part of all of this is his invoking the name of Esther Williams, most famous for her starring role in the 1949 film “Neptune’s Daughter,” and expecting those in that audience to have the slightest clue who in the hell that even is.
You seriously just could never make this guy up.
That is all.
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