Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
Government Shutdown, Day II: Still alive in New York City.
The sun still rose over Central Park (see photo for proof). Elevators in our hotel still function. Breakfast buffet still had sausages to piss off the vegans staying here. Local news reports that airline flights still taking off from La Guardia, JFK and Newark despite rampant rumors that air traffic controllers and Homeland Security have been shut down (hint: they haven’t been).
Streets devoid of sirens of hundreds of ambulances taking dying citizens to hospitals due to shutdown. Hospitals still actually open despite shutdown rumors. But the streets remain filled with yellow cabs staffed by extremely rude and often completely lost drivers who speak English as a third language. Times Square still filled with freaks in cartoon character costumes trying to rob you of your money. The guys in those pedicabs now charging $7 per minute (yes, per MINUTE!). Despite the Government Shutdown, the gaudy signs in the Square remain so brightly lit they can be spotted by all those aliens who hang out in the vicinity of Orion’s Belt.
Situation oddly normal.
That is all.