Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
To all Republicans: Celebrate! Barack Obama has returned! – The return of The One to the national stage on Friday had liberal nitwits all over the country shivering with goosebumps. Just the sound of Barack Obama’s droning voice reading his prepared script – written by a team of other people – from his ever-present TelePrompter always sends the lefties among us into orgasmic social media frenzies.
But the truth is that the Return of The One should have all Republicans celebrating in the streets this morning, and all the Democrat candidates on whose behalf Mr. Obama plans to campaign quaking in their Birkenstocks. Why? Let’s do a little stream of consciousness review:
When Obama took office thanks to our national bout with insanity at the voting booths in 2008, the Democrat Party was the clear, unchallenged, national majority party. The Democrats held the majority of governorships, the majority of state legislative chambers, super-majorities in both houses of congress, the presidency, and, whenever Anthony Kennedy forgot to take his meds, a frequent 5-4 majority on the Supreme Court.
Eight years later, when Donald Trump was sworn in on January 20, 2017, the Democrat Party had, thanks to 8 years of Obama and his un-American policies, shrunk to a small, marginalized regional party concentrated on the East and West coasts, and in a few big cities out here in Flyover Country. It held just 1/3rd of governorships, 1/3rd of state legislative chambers, and no levers of federal power at all.
While he was President, Barack Obama campaigned tirelessly on behalf of his fellow Democrats who were running for congress. The vast majority of those candidates lost. Obama’s record for helping get his fellow Democrats elected is roughly the same as Bill Clinton’s – dismal. This is mainly because Obama, like Clinton, is a pure narcissistic sociopath who cannot help making every speech he gives about him – not the guy or gal he’s campaigning for.
On Friday, Obama gave a 64 minute speech during which he referred to his own self 102 times. For those who are bad with numbers, that is ONE HUNDRED AND TWO TIMES this man made the speech about himself. A little simple division shows that that comes out to roughly 1.6 times per minute.
So, hey, he’s cutting wayyyyy back. Ok, just kidding.
The fake news media is telling us this morning that Obama’s speech was about Donald Trump, but this is nonsense. The speech was about Obama, because Obama is Obama’s favorite subject.
Some other quick thoughts about the speech:
Barack Obama 2009-2016: Ran an administration that worked feverishly – that is no exaggeration – to regulate this economy into submission.
Barack Obama, now that Trump has created a huge economic boom by rolling back his regulations: “I did that!”
Barack Obama on his economy’s chronic 1-2% growth rate from 2010-2016: “This is the new normal. You can’t just wave a magic wand and get to 3%.”
Barack Obama on Trump’s 4.2% growth: “I did that!”
Barack Obama to Mitt Romney on Russia in 2012: “The ’80s want their foreign policy back.”
Barack Obama on Russia now: “The Trump administration doesn’t take Russia seriously!”
This could go on and on, but this guy is so damn tiresome I just can’t make myself do it.
Republicans should be thrilled to death Obama is back in the public eye. His return comes just in time to kill any semblance of a chance that the Democrats might win back a majority in the House of Representatives. The last thing the Democrat Party needed to do right now is remind all those blue collar workers in Michigan, Pennsylvania and Ohio what their party saddled them with for 8 long years.
The timing is perfect. Welcome back, Barack!
That is all.
Follow me on Twitter at @GDBlackmon
Today’s news moves at a faster pace than ever. Whatfinger.com is my go-to source for keeping up with all the latest events in real time.