Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
- Well, maybe the Crazy Little Fat Guy in North Korea isn’t quite so crazy after all. – Shortly after Defense Secretary General James Mattis warned that the firing of North Korean missiles in the direction of any U.S. state or territory would be an act of war and treated by the U.S. with an overwhelming response, the Crazy Little Fat Guy appears, at least for now, to have backed down. In a silly-worded statement, the Crazy Little Fat Guy stated that he has decided not to launch the threatened four nuclear-armed missiles at Guam, a U.S. territory, saying he would “wait a little longer.” Mr. Crazy went on to say that “If the Yankees persist in their extremely dangerous reckless actions on the Korean Peninsula and in its vicinity, testing the self-restraint of the DPRK, the [North] will make an important decision as it already declared.” Ok, whatevs, dude.
- Sorry, Chubby, we’re all out of unleaded. – Another big motivating factor influencing this decision was obviously the action earlier in the day by China to cut off most trade with North Korea, including oil exports to the little dictatorship. Not even the Crazy Little Fat Guy is crazy enough to think he can run his military machine without fuel. No oil, no war. This is a really simple equation.
- CNN’s gonna need some new talking points. – China’s move represents a big win for U.S. diplomacy, led by President Trump, Sec. of State Rex Tillerson, and U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley. The move by China was its effort to comply with sanctions approved late last week by the U.N. Security Council, a proposal that was driven by the U.S. government. It took months of focused diplomacy and arm-twisting – and even a few threats – with China and Russia to finally achieve the unanimous vote required to enact such international trade sanctions. This, of course, does not fit the U.S. media’s narrative that the Trump Administration doesn’t do diplomacy, and so credit must go elsewhere in our fake media environment.
- Wait, is the FBI becoming a functioning agency again? – In what was treated as a minor news story as the fake news media obsessed over Charlottesville, the FBI announced it had, for once, stopped a planned terrorist attack. The agency arrested some dude named Jerry Varnell, who was planning to detonate a 1,000 lb. bomb in an effort to blow up the Federal Reserve Building in OKC. No, really, after the Obama years, during which we would have a terrorist kill a bunch of people followed by news that the terrorist had been under surveillance by the FBI for years without the agency taking any action, the FBI actually arrested a terrorist before he could kill anyone! Fantastic!
- Hope springs eternal, maybe. – Of course, Mr. Varnell is a white guy who was threatening to blow up federal government property, while all the terrorists who committed acts in recent years while under FBI surveillance were Muslims who planned to just kill private citizens on private property. It’s a sad thing, but I can’t help wondering if those factors have something to do with the FBI’s ability – or even willingness – to intervene with known terrorists before they kill people. Hopefully, this arrest is just a sign that things really are changing within the Justice Department and FBI, both of which had been hopelessly corrupted during the Obama years.
- Those Fightin’ Texas Aggies won’t be fightin’ this battle. – Speaking of Charlottesville and white nationalist demonstrations, the administration at Texas A&M University cancelled plans to allow what was being called a “White Lives Matter” demonstration on its campus in September, citing safety concerns. “Alt-Right” icon Richard Spencer was scheduled to come to the campus on September 11 to lead the rally. This move will of course be decried as suppression of free speech by Texas A&M – which, let’s admit it, it is – but, as long as the University also moves to cancel any planned rallies by violent leftwing George Soros groups like Black Lives Matter and Antifa, I really have no problem with this decision. Free speech is a wonderful thing, and any person should be free to say and believe whatever repugnant things they want to believe and say. But that doesn’t necessarily give anyone an unfettered right to stage any kind of rally they want to stage, and force universities to spend thousands of dollars on security to prevent violence from breaking out. It just doesn’t.
- And then he shouted “Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck!”*** – Incidentally, the best part of this whole episode was the statement from A&M Student Body President Bobby Brooks, who supported the University’s decision in classic Aggie fashion: “Students have come from a multitude of backgrounds and sacrificed many things to attend Texas A&M, and they have the right to go to classes without fearing for their safety. White supremacy and the violence that has accompanied it are most certainly ‘Bad Bull.'” ** Hilarious.
Just another day in ‘Bad Bull’ America.
That is all.
** From Wikipedia: ‘Bad Bull’ means anything not in keeping with Aggie traditions or the Aggie spirit.
***From Wikipedia: Beginning phrase of the Aggie War Hymn. The lyrics are an onomatopoeic representation of the sound a cannon being loaded, or also the sound of a train rolling through town since there is a train track that splits the campus.
Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
- It’s what they do; it’s who they are. – Well, U.S. intelligence agencies have determined that the Crazy Little Fat Guy (CLFG) over in North Korea now has the ability to deliver a nuclear warhead on his ICBMs, and liberal heads exploded all over America’s fake news media and the social media space. No, they didn’t explode at the news that CLFG has deliverable nukes – that would be far too sensible. Nor did their progressive heads explode with anger at former President Bill Clinton for his horrible 1994 deal with Pyong Yang that set the wheels in motion for this to happen, nor at George W. Bush and Barack Obama for fecklessly allowing the situation to fester for the last 16 years, joining Clinton in happily passing the buck off to the next guy.
- No, liberal heads exploded because President Donald Trump said the following in response: “North Korea best not make any more threats to the United States. They will be met with fire and fury like the world has never seen… he has been very threatening beyond a normal state. They will be met with fire, fury and frankly power the likes of which this world has never seen before.” But let’s be honest: President Trump could have sung the lyrics to “Hey, Jude” or recited the Gettysburg Address and gotten the same response. If he opens his mouth, liberal heads are going to explode.
- My first question about this whole episode is why should we trust the word of our intelligence agencies in their assertion that CLFG is now a threat to the U.S. mainland? These intel agencies have consistently demonstrated beyond any doubt that they are not trustworthy, and frankly, that they are not patriots. Their constant stream of leaks and false narratives over the last 7 months has severely hampered the ability of this President to govern the country, intentionally so. These agencies are not staffed with patriots, they are by and large staffed with skunks and snakes, the worst sort of DC swamp creatures who leak classified information and put others’ lives at risk for their own self-aggrandizement. There is no reason whatsoever to worry that Denver is in danger of being vaporized by North Korea based on the words of this collection of seditionists.
- Indeed, the expressed threat yesterday from Pyong Yang was aimed at…wait for it…GUAM, which happens to be the nearest U.S. territory to North Korean shores. Not Los Angeles, not Seattle, not Anchorage, not even Honolulu. Guam. Given his pretty consistent past behavior, it seems logical to believe that, if CLFG really had the ability to threaten a major U.S. city with his nukes, he’d be directing his threats there. I mean, c’mon, threatening the tiny island of Guam is like kicking a kitten. CLFG won’t get any street cred for that.
- Bottom line here: If you’re losing sleep in your bedroom in Texas over this intel-agency alleged threat, you’re most likely making yourself drowsy over nothing.
- Interestingly, Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov was the cool head in the room on Tuesday, advising everyone to remain calm. Go figure. Lavrov correctly pointed out that this kind of sabre rattling is how Pyong Yang has always responded to escalating sanctions from the UN (which were agreed upon over the weekend): “Strictly speaking, this is how representatives of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea have reacted to all previous U.N. Security Council resolutions,” he said, “We will judge by their actions.”
- Of course, were Trump to agree with Lavrov, Rod Rosenstein would immediately appoint another Special Counsel to investigate, and Wolf Blitzer’s beard would sprinkle to the floor at CNN headquarters.
Just another day in Everybody Chill Out, Please America.
That is all.
Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
- Somewhere, in an alternate universe from hell, Anthony Scaramucci and Megyn Kelly are getting married in a ceremony presided over by Maxine Waters. Reince Priebus is the best man, Katie Couric is the maid of honor, and Freddie Mercury is belting out “Bohemian Rhapsody”. I’m glad I don’t live in that universe. This one is cray cray enough.
- I hadn’t heard this until this morning, but in addition to a) being hired to do a job for which he had no visible qualifications, b) alienating everyone in the West Wing of the White House during his first 24 hours on the job, c) unwittingly giving the most profane interview in the history of the New Yorker Magazine, d) displaying a level of breathtakingly rank naivete’ towards the real nature of the fake news media, e) getting Reince Priebus fired, f) having divorce papers served on him by his Trump-hating wife, and g) getting not just fired, but forcibly escorted from the White House grounds, all within a span of 11 days, The Mooch’s wife also gave birth to a healthy new baby boy last Monday. The Telegraph reports that The Mooch was not only not present for the blessed event, he chose to send his congratulations to his estranged spouse via text message. Hey, at least he didn’t do it with a Tweet.
- Speaking of adult children, what in the hell is wrong with J.K. Rowling? The author of the unending series of Harry Potter books took a shot at President Trump a few days ago when she saw a snippet of video in which it appeared that President Trump had failed to shake the hand of a 3 year-old, wheelchair-bound boy at a White House reception. Ms. Rowling – who has been a serial basher of the President on her Twitter account – wrote “How stunning, and how horrible, that Trump cannot bring himself to shake the hand of a small boy who only wanted to touch the President.” Of course, it wasn’t horrible or stunning at all, if only one takes the time to view the full video of the reception. The President had in fact interacted with the boy a few seconds earlier, not only taking his hand, but bending down to hug him and spend time talking with him. Within hours, literally thousands of Twitter users pointed this truth out to the Rosie O’Donnell wannabe author.
- Any normal person possessed of the most rudimentary human manners would have had a simple solution: delete the tweet and apologize to both the little boy and the President. But not the mighty J.K. Rowling, oh no. Apparently simple good manners are beneath a fantasy writer of her stature and wealth. Days went by with no word from the author, despite a building number of reports on her bad behavior in the news media. Even when the boy’s parents tweeted directly to her that she was wrong and owed them, their son and the President an apology, no response the imperious writer.
- Finally, a full day after the parents’ plea, Ms. Rowling lowered herself to issue an apology, but only to the boy. It was only after Politifact weighed in on Monday, giving Ms. Rowling’s tweet a “Pants on Fire” rating, that the fantasy queen finally deleted the offending tweet. But still no apology to the boy’s parents or the President, whom she was slandering in the first place. What a creep.
- Somewhere, in another alternate universe, The Mooch is firing J.K. Rowling and giving her Harry Potter gig to Megyn Kelly. I’m glad I don’t live there, either.
Just another day in It’s The Mooch’s World And We’re Just Living In It America.
That is all.
Photo credit: Vox.com
Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
Indications abound that the Russia collusion fantasy play is dead as a doorknob. Here are some examples:
- Writing in the Washington Post, fake columnist David Ignatius, a regular guest on “Morning Joe”, posted a column titled “Working With Russia Might Be The Best Path To Peace In Syria”. I kid you not, somehow a piece with that theme made it past the WaPo’s fake editors, despite the fact that the WaPo has for the last two years been brutally pounding Donald Trump for even thinking such a thing, and the fact that the fake newspaper has willingly participated in supporting a Democrat/fake media-invented fantasy that alleges that Trump is in Vladimir Putin’s pocket.
- Next up is this story in Politico, in which several leading Democrats are quoted moving the goal posts on how the fantasy play’s final scene may eventually play out. Here, instead of alleging that Trump or people associated with this campaign may have somehow coordinated efforts with Russia to “hack” the U.S. election system, the Democrats have now begun to speculate that some nebulous, unidentified “Americans” or “American insiders” – whatever the hell that means – might have been the culprits who held the Russians to….ummmm…to do….welllll….to hack into….ummmm….ok they have no idea what any of this even means.
- Then there is this unintentionally hilarious defense from The Hill of the fake news media’s having to retract a raft of fake stories and fire a bunch of people in recent weeks: “Together, the corrections and retractions amount to only a few stories out of the thousands published every day. But the high-profile nature of the errors hurts the media’s credibility at a time when the press is under more scrutiny than ever before, giving new political ammunition to critics of the mainstream press.” In other words, the fake journalists at The Hill aren’t at all concerned about the fakeness of the stories on the various Democrat fantasy plays, they’re worried that the retractions and firings are helping the public catch onto the truth. Typical.
- And the fakery is not limited to the Russia Collusion fantasy. The Associated Press had to retract a fake story late last week in which it alleged that EPA Administrator Scott Pruitt is unjustly tilting environmental policy in favor of chemical companies. The key foundation for the story was a meeting the AP said Mr. Pruitt had with Dow Chemical CEO Andrew Liveris. The problem is, an investigation by Breitbart revealed that no such meeting ever took place. The AP initially refused to retract or even correct its fake story after Breitbart had notified its fake editors that their mendacity had been discovered, and only relented after the story went viral on Twitter and other social media.
- And hey, occasionally one of these fake news outlets even files a fake story without even knowing it’s fake. Take the NYTimes, for instance, which filed a story on Tuesday about the Crazy Little Fat Guy who runs North Korea. In the story, the NYTimes’ fake writers quote a Twitter account named @DPRK_News, which it identifies as a North Korean state-run media outlet. Only problem is, that Twitter account is a well-known fake. Upon learning of this, the fake editors at the fake newspaper issued a meek “correction” to their fake story.
Seriously, you would think that at some point, these fake editors and reporters would get tired of having to issue all these retractions and corrections, and maybe start focusing on real news. But then, that would make them real editors and reporters, and none of them remember what that even feels like anymore, assuming they ever did.
Just another day in fake news media America.
That is all.
Today’s Campaign Update
(Because The Campaign Never Ends)
- Heads exploded all over the fake news media last night over a Reuters report that, in a conversation with the President (i.e., Dictator) of the Phillipines, President Trump “revealed” the fact that the U.S. has two nuclear submarines somewhere in the general vicinity of North Korea: “We have a lot of fire power over there. We have two nuclear submarines, not that we want to use them.” The fake journalists who are trying to brainwash you want you to believe that this is the revelation of some deep, dark secret, right? Right. Trouble is, these two subs made a very, very well-advertised port of call in the general vicinity of North Korea just a few weeks ago.
- As a friend who knows about such things reminded me last night, this is called “projection of power”, a tactic designed to let the Crazy Little Fat Guy who rules North Korea know that we’re keeping a very close eye on him. It’s been pretty effective, too, since we haven’t heard much out of the Crazy Little Fat Guy – who just a few weeks ago was widely reported to be about to lead the world into WWIII – recently, have we? We should not expect the abject ignoramuses who infest our fake news media to understand any of this, of course, but that doesn’t mean we should let our heads to explode, too.
- He’s got my vote.: Montana Republican congressional candidate Greg Gianforte was accused of body-slamming a fake reporter with the U.K Guardian who barged uninvited into an event yesterday, on the eve of the vote to fill the seat vacated by new Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke. Americans all over the nation found themselves wishing they lived in Montana just so they could help Mr. Gianforte win.
- Today’s Required Reading.: There Remains No Evidence Of Trump-Russia Collusion. Seriously, just read it. It will make you smarter and better-informed than you were before. Promise.
- But doggone it, people like him!: Ed Morrissey reports that Minnesota Senator Al Franken has ruled out running for the presidency in 2020. He has apparently decided he isn’t good enough or smart enough.
- Writing in the NY Post, Maureen Callahan describes the problem MSNBC has on its hands with notorious serial fabricator Brian Williams: “Pre-election, the left-leaning MSNBC had been planning to pivot to hard news. Post-Trump, they’ve doubled down on punditry, to their great advantage. It’s hard to believe that not one executive is mulling their greatest contradiction: How can they employ an anchor known for pomposity, grandiosity and lies while decrying these very traits in the American president?” Well, hey, this is after all the same cable channel that has employed the likes of Al Sharpton, Keith Olberman, Larry O’Donnell and Andrea Mitchell. So, no problem at all.
- If her name was Trump lefties everywhere would be screaming about obstruction of justice. And they’d have a point.: The terminally vapid Debbie Wasserman Schulz was caught on camera threatening a police chief for collecting evidence related to her IT staffer’s alleged crimes. Oddly, none of the fake journalists in the fake news media accused the former DNC chair of any sort of misbehavior at all. Funny how that works.
- Whew! That was close.: Speaking to graduates of the Harvard Kennedy School, former Secretary of State Lurch, er, John Kerry, the architect of the very worst international agreement in American history with the Mullahs in Iran, told the audience that “this is not a normal time” for America. Well, color me relieved then.
Just another day in projection of power America.
That is all.
- If he worked at Fox, he’d be fired for blatant homophobia.: Stephen Colbert, the un-funny late night host on CBS, targeted President Trump with an obscene homophobic slur during his un-funny monologue Monday evening. Many observers questioned whether this meets CBS’s standards, and why the Federal Communications Commission remained silent on this clear violation of broadcast television rules, forgetting, of course, that CBS no longer has any standards and the FCC rules – like all other rules of civil discourse in our society – no longer exist after eight years of Barack Obama and his utter corruption of every nook and cranny of the federal government.
- If the manure is still steaming, it still stinks. Trust me.: The Trump Administration and congressional Republicans did their best on Tuesday to defend the smelly pile of horse manure (it’s ok to say that under FCC rules) that they are calling a “budget deal”. It didn’t work. The pile of manure still smells. Sorry, it just does.
- She really knows how to cheer Republicans up.: But no matter how awful this budget bill is, The Most Corrupt Woman In America reminded us how much more awful it could have been with a very timely interview with the fawning fake reporter Christian Amanpour. After saying she takes “full responsibility” for the horrible campaign she ran in 2016, The Most Corrupt Woman then went on to blame everyone else on earth for her loss. The woman really is incapable of uttering a true statement in public. She also touted the book she is writing about the campaign, describing the process as “incredibly painful.” Because uttering a few dozen lies in public comes very easy, but having to make up 80,000 words worth of lies is, like, hard.
- Can we get Dennis Rodman to moderate the discussion?: President Trump stated on Monday that he would meet with the Crazy Little Fat Guy who runs North Korea “under the right circumstances.” On Tuesday, fake journalists who thought it was fantastic when Barack Obama said exactly the same things about evil dictators in Iran and other despotic countries went all tsk-tsk on this President. Why? Because that’s what they do.
- Our news here at CNN is not just fake, it’s really, really fake.: CNN has become so transparently and proudly fake that it is now refusing to run Republican ads on its channel. After CNN refused to run a GOP ad touting the President’s many achievements during his first 100 days in office, President Trump tweeted the ad out and it went viral across social media platforms. How long can it be before CNN decides to designate May or June or some other month as Fake News Pride Month?
- That uncomfortable moment when you’re asked a question for which you have no good answer.: CEOs of four of the nation’s airlines, including United’s incredibly incompetent Oscar Munoz, were called to testify before the House Transportation Committee. Predictably, it did not go well. California Republican Duncan Hunter summed the entire hearing up in a single sentence when he asked Munoz, “Why do you hate the American people?” It’s a good question.
- We here at the United Nations like to just joke around sometimes.: Yesterday, Saudi Arabia was granted a seat on the United Nations’ worthless Women’s Rights Committee, and that’s pretty much all you need to know about the United Nations.
- The writer also forgets that this President owns his own jumbo jet.: HeatStreet ran with an article with the headline “Donald Trump Calls For A Shutdown That Could Kill His Mar-a-Lago Trips.” Yeah…no. The writer forgets that a government “shutdown” only shuts down non-essential services, which do not include the Secret Service or Air Force One.
Just another day in Everything is Fake America, even the government shutdowns.
That is all.
- Bill Nye, the fake “Science Guy” who has become a leading light of the ClimateFraud movement, is now branching out into other areas of social nitwittery. During a panel discussion earlier this week, he asked, “Should we have policies that penalize people for having extra kids in the developed world?” Perhaps Mr. Nye should change his nickname to “Bill Nye The Eugenics Guy.”
- Hey, you know all those shows about people building, buying and living in Tiny Houses? Yeah, they’re racist. Or something. Some writer named July (she was probably born in February but her parents couldn’t spell it) Westhale, writing at some obscure website called The Establishment, complains that this trend of prosperous people choosing to live in small houses amounts to something she calls “poverty appropriation.” No really, I swear I don’t make this stuff up. Here’s the link. You can read the whole thing if you want to, but doing so is likely to lower your IQ by about 10 points.
- Conservative writer Ann Coulter cancelled her planned speech at Berkeley University, citing looming threats of rioting and violence from an array of “progressive”, i.e. fascist, groups. Amazingly, the ACLU, which has managed to remain silent throughout the last six months as these fascist, anti-free speech groups have wrought havoc across the nation, finally somehow managed to summon the fortitude to issue the following Tweet: “The heckler’s veto of Coulter’s Berkeley speech is a loss for the 1st Amendment. We must protect speech on campus, even when hateful.” Boy, that’s some really bold talk from our country’s self-proclaimed protector of the First Amendment, huh? They must’ve really been riled up to Tweet like that. Hopefully, they’ve gotten themselves back under control this morning. Whew.
- Former Vice President Joe Biden received a standing ovation when he attended a Washington Wizards basketball game on Wednesday night. He actually thought he was at the Washington Nationals game, and kept asking his friends when did they start playing baseball in shorts? Ok, I don’t know if he did that, but be honest: you wouldn’t be surprise if he did, now, would you?
- But hey, the UN makes Bill Nye look like almost a serious person.: The United Nations warned President Trump in early February that repealing Obamacare would “put the U.S. at odds with its international obligations.” Just another reason to leave the UN.
- Wait. Is there a problem here? Because I don’t see it.: President Trump’s tax plan was introduced on Wednesday, and it predictably created a firestorm among defenders of traditional high-tax, Democrat states. Why? Because the plan would eliminate all personal deductions other than mortgage interest and charitable contributions. Which means that state income and sales taxes would no longer be deductible. Which means that the plan would penalize residents who live in socialist enclaves like New York, California, New Jersey and Washington. Which seems to me to be the very essence of just desserts.
- This is CNN.: President Trump held a briefing for all 100 members of the U.S. Senate regarding the situation with North Korea, which his military chiefs characterized as “very grave.” The only aspect of the meeting that CNN and the fake media wanted to talk about was why the meeting was held in the White House offices instead of on Capitol Hill. Likewise, after the President’s tax reform proposal was introduced, all the fake media wanted to talk about was the President’s tax returns. #Fakenews is their life.
- How long before the Nobel Committee gives in to the Clinton pressure?: The well-coordinated effort between the Clinton machine and the fake news media to convince you that Chelsea Clinton really, truly is a serious person who you should make your president someday continued to escalate, as the achievement-devoid, dimwitted daughter of The Most Corrupt Woman in America was given yet another award for doing pretty much nothing of note. This time it was something called the “City Harvest Award For Commitment to Fighting Hunger” in New York City. Why did this award go to Chelsea? Well, it turns out that she once spent half a day loading grapefruit into boxes so they could be distributed to New York’s poor residents. Now, we should never belittle any efforts to help the poor, but this is such an insult to those who volunteer so much of their time to assist operations like The Vineyard in my old hometown of Beeville, or volunteer every week at the United Way, the Salvation Army or Goodwill distribution centers in cities across the country, and seldom if ever receive any recognition for doing so. Please, Democrats, make the Clintons, especially their dimwitted daughter, slink off into the ash bin of history where they belong. You have better people to waste your votes on, don’t you?
Just another day in Everything is Fake, especially Chelsea Clinton, America.
That is all.
- Hmmmm…lessee here…should we vacation in Hawaii, or North Korea? Costa Rica, or North Korea? Italy, or North Korea? An Alaskan cruise, or North Korea? Vegas, or hey honey, how about North Korea? Boy, this is hard…: The UK Independent reports that a North Korean defector, who claims to have been a corporal in the NK Army, says that The Crazy Little Fat Guy who rules that country has a plan to kidnap tourists if his country is attacked. Seriously? Tourists? We have people who take vacations to that porta-potty of a country? Voluntarily? Who are these people, and should we really be worried about them if they have no better judgment than that? Holy cow.
- Hey, doc. See, I have this, uh, issue, when, you know, I’m…well, I’m trying to, you know…and well, I think I need some…ummm…well, you know what I’m saying here, right?: Speaking of The Crazy Little Fat Guy, his missile program continues its pattern of projectile dysfunction. His much-heralded test launch of an intermediate-range ballistic missile exploded less than five seconds after leaving the launch pad. Deputy National Security Advisor K.T. McFarland was evasive about whether the U.S. government may have had something to do with this latest failure to launch when questioned by Chris Wallace on Fox News Sunday.
- Here at United Airlines, our employees are committed to mishandling any incident in a way that creates maximum reputational damage.: In yet another customer service fiasco, a couple traveling to Costa Rica were kicked off their flight in Houston when they attempted to change seats on a half-empty flight. The couple claims that, when they found their designated seats occupied by a barefooted guy sleeping across the entire row, they decided that, rather than waking him, they would take seats a few rows forward on the plane. Turns out that they had only paid economy fare, and those seats happened to be “economy plus” seats that give you four additional inches of leg room. United charges you a princely sum for those extra four inches, and the couple claims that within two minutes of moving to their new, pricier seats, air marshals showed up and removed the couple from the flight without explanation. For its part, United claims the couple repeatedly ignored the crew’s instructions to move back to economy class, and were disruptive, which sounds like the more realistic scenario. But that doesn’t matter, because the fake news media is reporting the story from the couple’s perspective. The whole point here is that United has to find a way to stop kicking paying customers off its flights and bringing this kind of fire into its own position.
- It would be America’s first “tell-nothing” book.: Long-time companion to The Most Corrupt Woman In America and wife of America’s Most Wanted Pervert, Huma Abedin, is shopping what she’s calling a “tell-all” book to publishers. She’s looking for a $2 million advance to “spill her secrets”. Of course, this is just another Clintonian racket, as Ms. Abedin is still hanging around with Hillary, which means every word in any such book would be vetted, polled and focus-grouped by the Clinton minions. Which of course means that anything that’s actually true would be rejected. Good luck with that.
- Um, well, seems like you might have wanted to figure this out BEFORE you published the piece.: This may be the greatest fake news media story ever. Late last week, the fake editors at the Huffington Post fake news site gave the green light to a guest opinion piece titled “Could It Be Time To Deny White Men The Franchise?” As one might guess, a piece proposing to deny the vote to white men (seriously, how racist and sexist can one be?) in America generated a great deal of controversy, but the HuffPo fake editors held firm and even publicly defended the piece and its author. But then, on Sunday, the piece was removed from the HuffPo site. The fake Huffpo editors did release a statement that hilariously reads, in part “We have done this because the blog submission from an individual who called herself Shelley Garland, who claimed to be an MA student at UCT, cannot be traced and appears not to exist.” #Fakenews, defined.
Just another Easter weekend in fake news America.
That is all.
- I’m old enough to remember when they actually played music.: It seems the only way the Dixie Chicks can sell records is to send their obnoxious lead singer, Natalie Maines, out there to bash a Republican president. During the height of the Iraq War, Ms. Maines issued her complaints about George W. Bush during the group’s concert events in Europe. They can’t attract an audience anymore, so now Ms. Maines has resorted to social media, issuing nasty tweets to President Trump. My goodness.
- This is Jerry Brown, “skillfully” stealing and spending other people’s money.: After the California legislature passed yet another massive tax increase on the state’s beleaguered residents – this time in the form of a major raise in the gasoline tax – the fake reporters at the Associated Press published a piece with the headline “California’s gas tax hike shows governor’s political skill”. Presumably, when the AP publishes a future fake news item about all the businesses and residents who abandon the Golden State as a result of its soul-crushing tax burden, it will carry the headline “California’s mass exodus shows governor’s relocation skill”.
- Ok, well, maybe it was two lone wolves. Oh, wait…: Islamic terrorists killed at least 44 Christians in two separate church bombings on Palm Sunday. Fake reporters and fake editors all over the U.S. fake news media were left feverishly scrambling to find a way, some way, to blame it all on their cherished “lone wolf.” Meanwhile, ISIS yet again took full credit for this latest atrocity.
- The liberal Boogeyman speaks.: Russia announced on Sunday that it would respond to any further U.S. military actions against the Syrian government with military action of its own. This left fake reporters and fake editors all over the fake U.S. news media scrambling to invent a rationale to credit Russia’s statement to it’s cherished “Trump/Russia” coordination fantasy.
- Hey…did Vlad sign off on this?: Meanwhile, the Trump Administration put Syrian dictator Bashar Al-Assad on notice that it will take further military action should Syria again resort to the use of chemical weapons. Contrary to the belief of the fake news media, Vladimir Putin was not consulted prior to the issuance of that notice.
- Beware of praise coming from ghouls.: In an appearance on Fox News on Sunday, war-mongering Senator Lindsey Graham said “I would say this about President Trump, I’m proud of him. He did something Obama did not do and if I’m North Korea I’m going to think differently about Trump. He didn’t draw a red line, he just acted.” That’s all well and good, but we should all hope that the President takes any praise coming from the Graham/McCain war hawk faction of the U.S. Senate as a reason to even more carefully review everything that he’s planning to do in the Middle East. It’s one thing to bomb an air field in retaliation for a chemical weapons atrocity, but these guys want to send 200,000 U.S. men and women into another country’s civil war, and that is a different thing entirely.
Just another day in Red Line Enforcing America.
That is all.