Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) – 3.28.2017

  • Great idea – where do we go to pitch in?:  Don’t look now (ok, go ahead and look), but Nigel Farage and Aaron Banks, who led the whole “Brexit” effort to a successful conclusion, have now turned their attention to support for the “Calexit” effort.  Well, except that it’s not really the “Calexit” effort we’ve been hearing about – you know, the one that would blessedly remove the entire state of California from the United States of America.  No, the effort for which Farage and Banks have successfully raised about a million bucks is a plan that would split the Golden State down the middle from north to south, leaving an inevitably Democrat-dominated state on the coast, and an inland state in which Republicans would most likely dominate.  While not as pleasing as the real “Calexit”, the Farage/Banks plan (CalSplitzit?) would have the happy effect of diluting California’s impact in presidential politics, and likely add two more Republicans to the Senate.  However, the one big drawback is that the  CalSplitzit plan would relegate Napa Valley and its fabulous wines to the tyranny of the Marxist state into which West California would inevitably devolve.  Still, any outcome that dilutes the influence of West coast lefties is a good plan for America.  Sign me up!
  • Hey, ABC keeps out-faking us – whadda we gonna do?:  Management at NBC/MSNBC obviously became worried their news was just not fake enough last week, so they decided to hire former Obama White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest as a new political contributor.  Thus Mr. Earnest follows in the #FakeNews footsteps of George Stephanopoulous, who pretends to be a news anchor on rival ABC.  Who can doubt that Mr. Earnest will be pretending to host his own fake news program in the very near future?
  • The Dumbest Thing You Will Read This Week.  Promise.:  Speaking of fake journalists, fake reporter Norm Ornstein has a new piece in The Atlantic in which he proposes that all these allegations – for which we still have yet to see a single, solitary bit of real evidence – that the Russians and Trump campaign coordinated during the past election mean that we simply must change the rules for presidential succession.  This piece is so breathtakingly devoid of solid reasoning or journalistic ethics that it simply must be read to be believed, so follow the link above if you dare.
  • Can highway funds be far behind?:  Attorney General Jeff Sessions announced on Monday that sanctuary cities will soon be cut off from receiving any and all of their current funding from the Justice Department.  This is what is commonly known as “a good start.”
  • If you have another explanation, please let me know.:  The New York Post reported over the weekend that Hillary Clinton’s long-time companion Huma Abedin is supposedly going to give her pervert husband, Anthony Weiner, another chance to make their “marriage” work.  Weiner is currently under investigation for having inappropriate relations with a minor, among many other things, and Huma reportedly remains in potential legal jeopardy due to her long association with The Most Corrupt Woman in America.  In case you haven’t figured it out already, the obvious reason for these two habitual offenders to remain married is so that they can preserve the right to claim “spousal immunity” in each other’s eventual prosecutions.  Not exactly brain surgery.
  • She blames the Russians.:  In other news, a woman was arrested for the second time since Election Day for attempting to jump the fence at the White House.  Can somebody please get Hillary Clinton under control?

Just another day in CalSplitzit America.

That is all.

3 thoughts on “Today’s Campaign Update (Because The Campaign Never Ends) – 3.28.2017

  1. D. Moore - March 28, 2017

    We were on a flight a few weeks ago to DC and a guy asked me to hand him his bag from the overhead storage. I thought he looked familiar and handed him his bag – then I realized it was fake news man “meet the press” Chuck Todd.

    Mr. Todd then strolled through the airport hands-free while his staff of three petite women followed 50 yards behind him carrying all of the “Meet The Press with Chuck Todd” bags. What a guy!

    1. David Blackmon - March 28, 2017

      You should’ve told him to get his own damn bag. 🙂

      1. D Moore - March 28, 2017

        I certainly would have had I recognized him beforehand! Without a doubt.

Comments are closed.

Scroll to top